Bedroom Relationships

I was having a catch up session with one of my girlfriends recently and I was inspired to write on this topic. We got talking and she started telling me about this girl who has a ‘bedroom relationship’ with her boyfriend.

What I gathered from our conversation is that the said boyfriend does not like making his private life publicly known so that means no going out on dates of any kind. If they want to have a dinner date, it all goes down in the guy’s house with candles and all that stuff, if they want to watch a movie they will rather stay home and have their own home cinema. So basically the world does not know that they are an item, they are the only ones that know that they exist, pretty sad right? That's what I thought.

Now let’s get talking, I personally believe making your relationship life private is totally different from your partner not being proud of you. Why would you be in a 'committed' relationship with someone who isn't proud enough to take you out or even introduce you as his girl to anyone? Do you really think you are in a relationship or in some sort of joke? I am going to be blunt and straightforward here, there is no need sugar-coating this I think, it is very stupid for any girl to be in a committed relationship with a guy who isn't ready to show you off. A guy who is in love with you will be crazy about you and would be ready to show the world that he's got you.  The minute he begins to talk about wanting to keep you private he is not serious and he is probably just keeping you as an option. If he isn't ready to show you off he is not ready for commitment, he doesn't know what he wants, he doesn't know your worth and/ or he just isn't sure if you are what he wants. If you guys have only just started going out, then I can understand if he doesn't want it public yet but when it’s getting to about a year and he is still keeping it private?, girl have a rethink.

If a guy is confused about you, as a girl who knows her worth and knows God has prepared that one man for her you will help him decide by deleting yourself as one of his options (hard, I know). You are not an option and should never let any guy make you one. Your father (God) is a king and you are his princess so he already has a prince for you, the one who will know what your worth and be ready to show you off to the world. Simply because, princess don't get to be private. If you keep enduring this joke of a guy you will be missing out on the one God has prepared for you. Once you leave the joker, work on making yourself better as a single lady so when your prince comes you will be ready.

I know it’s easier said than done because you are madly in love with this guy but truth is you deserve better and in situations like that you have to push yourself, surround yourself with friends that can uplift your spirit, occupy your mind with productive things and you will see how well you will be doing. Never be an option to any guy because you are a priority to one guy.

The New Trend?

Hi guys, I know I haven't been faithful to you guys and I am so sorry, Laziness somehow just got a hold of me but I pray I overcome that this year and be more dedicated to my blog. You will be getting more of me this year by God's grace. Now to the topic of today! The new trend.. What about the new trend? What is the new trend? Please read and feel free to comment.

I certainly didn't get the memo but I think the recent trend just has to be females - teens and adolescents rushing to get married. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with this trend or development, it seems that these ladies are under a lot of pressure. For instance, a 22 year old lady is already being worried about getting a man that will marry her and I am just here askance? You still have your whole life ahead of you; so why the rush. The aim of most young ladies now is the big rock (yes, we'll always love our best friends, diamonds) and the big wedding. Do we ever think of a big career? The big dream to become something very useful to yourself? Social networks are not even helping nowadays as people flaunt their relationships, their rings or the lavish weddings. We forget that people let you see the part they only want the world to see, we can only imagine what happens behind closed doors/ isn't brought to our attention. It’s a great moment when he pops the question, the big rock is great too and lest I forget the lavish wedding is also fantastic but do we think about the marriage itself? What happens after the wedding? The morning after?  I have the fear that our generation will record a very high rate of divorce seeing the rate at which some girls will just settle for anything or anyone just to be married or have a change of name.

Marriage is not something that should be rushed into, it takes a lot of processes, deep thought and decision-making. A girl intending to get married should ask herself these questions else a divorce might result ‘am I emotionally ready? Is it time to actually make my life revolve around this one man and kids should we have any? ‘Am I ready to submit to this guy and be patient with him when things are out of control?

 If your answers to these questions are in the affirmative, then I've got great news for you, you can go ahead and marry that man. You can only make sure that it is mutual and the man is committed. If you cannot provide answers or your answers are No, No and No, you might need to sit down have a rethink regarding the step you are about to take.

I am certainly not against early marriage provided the above questions have been asked and answered and they are sure that they are ready to be with this man forever and I am certainly not saying the questions above are the only determinants but I think they are part of the important ones which should be thought about. All I am saying is ladies should make sure that they are not under pressure to get married which is kind of the new trend, most girls are desperate to flaunt their rings and they put men in very tight situations to pop the question or even suggest it at every chance they get.

It is always good to take your time ladies, no need to rush anything as marriage is a lifetime commitment and adequate consideration should be taken before getting into it.

My Dream Woman

It all began on sunny afternoon, sun was shinning bright when I saw this epitome of beauty, her skin glowed in the sun she was a perfect woman. She was walking towards where my friends and I were and there was joy in my heart as I noticed this, I did not realize she was with two of her other friends as I was busy admiring her. Then one of my friends tapped me back to life.
Perfect because they were my friend's friend and they had come to chill with my friends and I on this Saturday afternoon. Her name is Laura, a wonderful name for a wonderful lady right? Yes I had the same thoughts. Her body was more than perfect, she was an angel, a God sent with her thick African curvy body, straight and nice legs, about 5ft8 in height, she ticked all the boxes for a perfect woman for me.
I on the other hand wouldn't call myself a wow handsome young man but I ticked the boxes for most ladies I have met in my lifetime. Amazing 6ft2 guy, sexy body with my albs and muscles intact and a good face to match this body. I have a good job in one of the best banks in Nigeria, I own my apartment and I have a car. Don't get me wrong, I did not say I am very rich but I am comfortable enough to take care of my woman's needs. She works with a telecommunications company, she was a good talker and a good listener(this I really admired). I noticed how well she will listen to other people's opinion and as also engage in a good conversation with you. Nice, humble,friendly and jovial lady and yea she ticked all the boxes of my dream woman. We got along from the first day and I took a further step of taking her phone number, then I had a date with her the following weekend, it was heavenly as all heads titled as we walked in the room. I was so proud to be the man with this gorgeous lady everyone in  the room is admiring, (even the females were looking at us or maybe they were admiring me who knows). 
Overtime the friendship grew and became stronger, she was classy, elegant, name it and she can claim it. After a while we got together in a relationship, yea we became an item. It was sweet and good for 5years then I thought I should put a ring on it. I had taken her to my mom a couple of times and yes she is a wife material, cooks well, very neat and tidy trust me she almost had no flaws (of course she had one or two, no one is born perfect).
The day came for me to ask my lady to marry me, the night I had my plans to put a ring on it ( oh yeah before I forget she is excellent in bed, satisfies her man very very well). I had my plans mapped out and I planned with some air hostesses because we were both going to Abuja from Lagos by air. One of the air hostesses was going to put the ring in her drink and after she has taken her drink she will find the ring then I will ask her to marry me (proposal tip for guys there). Everything worked according to plan and the air hostesses were around to clap and cheer as soon as she says yes to my proposal.
After my dream woman had her drink and found the ring in it, she frowned and looked at me and said 'Can you imagine these Nigerian airlines, what is the meaning of this?' and then I said to her will you marry me on my knees. She stood up, gave a stern look and then a very hot slap and then she dashed to the lavatory. I was in shock, I could not even take my seat and everyone was asking me "Is she not your girlfriend?, why will she do that?" etc. I was just dumbfounded and looked like a fool.
When she came back from the lavatory she said nothing to me till we got to Abuja and there she made it clear to me that I did not match her standards, yes you read that right my dream woman of 5years said I wasn't her type of man, I was too poor for her to think of settling down with me. Her eyes were on one of the rich men's children in Nigeria, she told me she enjoyed my company and attention that was why she has been with me but she saw no future with someone like me. She said so many hurting things to me and I could not help but think I was dreaming, the disgrace on the plane was grand, a woman I have been with for 5years did not see me in her future because she wanted someone very rich, she could not suffer for any reason. Yes I was more than hurt but life must go on, it was evident enough she did not want me but what will I tell momma? She was already thinking I have found myself a good thing. Can we call that a bloody friendzone of 5years? and I could not see any signs till I asked her to marry me.
Suddenly I heard my alarm went off in my sleep and then I checked my time it was 5:30am time to get ready for work. I was sweating profusely and was pondering over this horrible dream or should I say nightmare I have just had. Wheeewww! Thank God it was just a dream though if it had been real how will I have lived with the shame in my life? Yes she was my dream woman and she only existed in my dream I think that is why I will never get her because she lives in my dream