Bedroom Relationships

I was having a catch up session with one of my girlfriends recently and I was inspired to write on this topic. We got talking and she started telling me about this girl who has a ‘bedroom relationship’ with her boyfriend.

What I gathered from our conversation is that the said boyfriend does not like making his private life publicly known so that means no going out on dates of any kind. If they want to have a dinner date, it all goes down in the guy’s house with candles and all that stuff, if they want to watch a movie they will rather stay home and have their own home cinema. So basically the world does not know that they are an item, they are the only ones that know that they exist, pretty sad right? That's what I thought.

Now let’s get talking, I personally believe making your relationship life private is totally different from your partner not being proud of you. Why would you be in a 'committed' relationship with someone who isn't proud enough to take you out or even introduce you as his girl to anyone? Do you really think you are in a relationship or in some sort of joke? I am going to be blunt and straightforward here, there is no need sugar-coating this I think, it is very stupid for any girl to be in a committed relationship with a guy who isn't ready to show you off. A guy who is in love with you will be crazy about you and would be ready to show the world that he's got you.  The minute he begins to talk about wanting to keep you private he is not serious and he is probably just keeping you as an option. If he isn't ready to show you off he is not ready for commitment, he doesn't know what he wants, he doesn't know your worth and/ or he just isn't sure if you are what he wants. If you guys have only just started going out, then I can understand if he doesn't want it public yet but when it’s getting to about a year and he is still keeping it private?, girl have a rethink.

If a guy is confused about you, as a girl who knows her worth and knows God has prepared that one man for her you will help him decide by deleting yourself as one of his options (hard, I know). You are not an option and should never let any guy make you one. Your father (God) is a king and you are his princess so he already has a prince for you, the one who will know what your worth and be ready to show you off to the world. Simply because, princess don't get to be private. If you keep enduring this joke of a guy you will be missing out on the one God has prepared for you. Once you leave the joker, work on making yourself better as a single lady so when your prince comes you will be ready.

I know it’s easier said than done because you are madly in love with this guy but truth is you deserve better and in situations like that you have to push yourself, surround yourself with friends that can uplift your spirit, occupy your mind with productive things and you will see how well you will be doing. Never be an option to any guy because you are a priority to one guy.

The New Trend?

Hi guys, I know I haven't been faithful to you guys and I am so sorry, Laziness somehow just got a hold of me but I pray I overcome that this year and be more dedicated to my blog. You will be getting more of me this year by God's grace. Now to the topic of today! The new trend.. What about the new trend? What is the new trend? Please read and feel free to comment.

I certainly didn't get the memo but I think the recent trend just has to be females - teens and adolescents rushing to get married. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with this trend or development, it seems that these ladies are under a lot of pressure. For instance, a 22 year old lady is already being worried about getting a man that will marry her and I am just here askance? You still have your whole life ahead of you; so why the rush. The aim of most young ladies now is the big rock (yes, we'll always love our best friends, diamonds) and the big wedding. Do we ever think of a big career? The big dream to become something very useful to yourself? Social networks are not even helping nowadays as people flaunt their relationships, their rings or the lavish weddings. We forget that people let you see the part they only want the world to see, we can only imagine what happens behind closed doors/ isn't brought to our attention. It’s a great moment when he pops the question, the big rock is great too and lest I forget the lavish wedding is also fantastic but do we think about the marriage itself? What happens after the wedding? The morning after?  I have the fear that our generation will record a very high rate of divorce seeing the rate at which some girls will just settle for anything or anyone just to be married or have a change of name.

Marriage is not something that should be rushed into, it takes a lot of processes, deep thought and decision-making. A girl intending to get married should ask herself these questions else a divorce might result ‘am I emotionally ready? Is it time to actually make my life revolve around this one man and kids should we have any? ‘Am I ready to submit to this guy and be patient with him when things are out of control?

 If your answers to these questions are in the affirmative, then I've got great news for you, you can go ahead and marry that man. You can only make sure that it is mutual and the man is committed. If you cannot provide answers or your answers are No, No and No, you might need to sit down have a rethink regarding the step you are about to take.

I am certainly not against early marriage provided the above questions have been asked and answered and they are sure that they are ready to be with this man forever and I am certainly not saying the questions above are the only determinants but I think they are part of the important ones which should be thought about. All I am saying is ladies should make sure that they are not under pressure to get married which is kind of the new trend, most girls are desperate to flaunt their rings and they put men in very tight situations to pop the question or even suggest it at every chance they get.

It is always good to take your time ladies, no need to rush anything as marriage is a lifetime commitment and adequate consideration should be taken before getting into it.